new year eve.

new year.hmm,to be a better person.
more hardworking.haha.
so you guys gonna see me with eye bags.hee.
i want to have a total GPA of 3.5.
I'm not please with my attitude and behaviour i have for this whole 2008.
god bless me.haha!

Cullen's boys.
thanks zira.


i had a dream and i wish that doesn't come true.
miss you,baby.

when will we meet again?

Jackson Rathbone

okay okay.I'm a little bit obsess with Jackson Rathbone.
who played jasper hale Cullen in twilight.
hehehe.i should stop this madness and obsess-ness of an actor or anybody.
HOWEVER he is nice looking creature right?
okay okay.
i stop now.i want to eat!!and watch television!!

baby, i love you.

i know i know.i keep on changing the blog skins.
i can say i am a very picky person.
very very fickle minded too.
hmm,i want to look for something that i can just stick with it for a very very long time.
do you think this skin is okay?i want something simple.
is this simple enough?BTW i know flower thingy doesn't suit me.but i like this skin(i think)
still hunting some blog skins.heh.

I'm sure i make a good hunter if i hunt for food.
imagine it.hmmm*evil grin*

my oh my.i should stick to this skin now.
should credit the creator.the skin is nice.

well tmr is swensen's Christmas party.
venue:westmall swensen's
time:eleven night till i don't know when.

well i bought the presents and give it to Elizabeth already.
seems like I'm looking forward for the day,however I'm not.
don't ask why.i just don't.
they said there's food(it's a must,if not i refuse to come),
games(I'm sure i will sweat like a pig),
present exchange(i hope i don't get solihin's present) and etc.
the next following day,i will be working morning,Allah safe me.
gonna be tired man.

still sick.i don't like it.my hand hurts.
i already put some ointment that ruhaizat dear bought for me.
Insyaallah i will heal in no time.
i hope i will before attachment start.

somehow i am half heartedly looking forward for my attachment.
have to feed patient via tubes now.REAL PATIENTS man.
scary.and put tubes through nose to the stomach.scary scary.
tuhan tolonglah tabahkan dan kuatkan hatiku ini.

baby,i know you working hard.
but please take care of your health.
i miss you.

my skin look distorted.
haha,soup spilled on my hand.
happen on wednesday.
still sick.
can't wait for results.
bored to death.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAYANG.

addicted to Full Moon by The Black Ghosts.

sicksicksick!

crap crap crap.i hate this.went to polyclinic this morning.WHAT THE HELL.
the doctor give me whole lot crap of medicine!!and also MC.i don't fake my sick okay.
i hate it,hate the taste of medicine.i can't even taste food.my nose is like running tap.
my dustbin full of tissues.and SHIT MAN.my medicine can cause drowsiness.

i hate being sick!i hate skipping work!!i hate finding replacement.
AND TOMORROW I WORK!!Allah safe me.i am super tired.very very tired.
and this is what i get from working alot and eating alot of cotton candies.seriously.

luckily ruhaizat dear accompany me to doctor.hate to wait long to see a doctor.
i think i can die of boredom and cough lots of time while waiting.
and stupid,after post this, i will take my medication and sleep for a while.
thanks dear for accompanying me.

outings

SUNDAY(21DECEMBER2008)
after work,went to vivo city.
meet mother,isyam,auntie maria,auntie Liza,uncle Eddie,Aden and uncle Jackie.
to meet faizan actually.she and the BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE have stalls there.
selling handmade stuff which is super nice.they are talented people.
i bought hand phone chain for myself.
and also!they do manicure.my mother do it.nice,very nice.
luckily that one person is not there.
if she's present,i think i will have hypertension.
there's a HUGE Christmas tree.nice!!!

SATURDAY(20 DECEMBER 2008)
went out with lovely zira!go town.want to watch TWILIGHT.
at Cathay cineleisure.hee.catch the 5pm show.ate KFC!!
we had fun!haha.well the funny part comes when zira tried to take pictures of us together.
only GOD and US know about it.I'm still laughing about it.

THURSDAY(18DECEMBER2008)
went out with RUHAIZAT.went to vivocity.
we didn't fight!!woohoo!!walk walk there.saw HUDA!with her mum.
haha.didn't expect to see her there.:)
i had a great time with you sayang!:)

don't ever regard a friend like a doll.
don't label them as friend if you never appreciate them.
don't treat a friend like heaven when you need them.
i am serious.
don't a friend make any different your life?
don't a friend stays really in your heart?
or you just treat them like a passing stone?
don't you notice that you hurt a friend.
don't you even notice that a friend actually appreciate you?
i doubt it.
21/10/2008

i hate it so much that you treat something from the past like it doesn't related to you.
i hate you,seriously.i hate you.
don't chat with me if you are bored.
i'm not your friend when you are bored.
you read this!?!?you dumbass!

tmr meet ruhaizat dear!!woohoo!!
saturday meet zira dear!!woohoo!!
can't wait can't wait.

realise that it's no use to get angry.
because without them we equal to nothing.
because she cares.
because she love.
i was touched.
she still keep food for me.
i love you.

tmr want to jog!!yeah man.
JOG WITH RUAHIZAT BABY!!!
and alone for the whole day.and off to work.
tralalala.i'm dead tired.can't wait to sleep more,
as that is one of my favourite hobby.hee.

"Leave Out All The Rest"
I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what I made

I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are

working marathon

alrights,woke up early this morning.to meet fai.i let her borrow breaking dawn.
hahah.then get my books from her.after this let it to Nora.wow.
hahaha.and it's my pleasure to borrow people my stuff.as long it came back in one piece.

alrights.later working 4-11.hahah.start working tmr non-stop until 18 DEC.
can't wait for that day.meet sayang.Insya-Allah.
and also dear zira.tralalalala!!
going to eat now.go wash up and get ready to work.
hahaha.BORED TO DEATH NOW.

back to sleep alone again.
i miss her.

I've decide.to keep both.BOTH.
I'm back to my bad habits.

i hate people actually yelling to communicate here.
i swear if you are on my nerve again.
i swear, solemnly swear that i punch you right on your face.

monday blues.

my mother bought a printer.just realise it when i just came back from work yesterday.
was shocking.wowowowow!!haha,because it's like complete set now.for me.hahaha.

i love the the company at home and i wish it to happen quickly.BIG!complete.
i need to get use to noise at home then and it's not something to cry over or negative.
i state this because I'm so use to and still use to silence at home and constant shouting at home.
but not a cheerful voice.

this beautiful holiday.gonna work like crazy. jog if time permit.
well,my off days is for going out or just rest.yeah.

the date is set.going out with zira dear.
can't wait can't wait.:)woohoo.i miss you.

feel like doing something.don't know what.hahaha.clueless me clueless.

i miss you ruhaizat.

did runner for the whole day,12-11.cool i like.
feet sore from walking too much.
izan came home since morning.
eating spaghetti while typing.I'm hungry like a pig now.

and thinking who the hell make me a empty soul.damn.

finish my spaghetti now.craving for more.
pig faizah pig.

hold two things in one hand.don't know which to let it go.
I'm going back to my habits.

just came back from east coast park with solynyster gates and friends.
great bunch of friends i can say.haha.play dog and bone and captain ball.my toes is painful right now.
they keep stepping on my tiny toes.
im dead tired right now.haha.going to turn in soon.tmr is another sucky day for me.
will be working from 12 to 11.suck right?well,you will say got overtime pay.
but for me,my sister is coming home and i feel bad,very bad.
i know she had and have complaint of why i always working.like no time for family.
sorry adikku sayang.minta maaf.
i feel bad til noow.i guess whoever is in my position before will feel how i feel.
itry to cut down on working days.for family and for myself.

i need rest from the endless school days.and this holiday.i'm going to make full use of it.
AND I DONT WISH YOU GUYS COMPARE WITH FULL TIME JOB.
seriously.i definitely feel their pain.hahaha!
its like haviingg your attachment at hospital.so tiring i tell you.
but for me its fun.waking up to know your patient is growing healthy and going to discharge soon.
fun right?i think working as a nurse is a fulfilling job.:)dont you think?

haha.turning in now.tmr is another day.SMILE while you can.

and baby,i love you.

today.woohoo!guess what?i woke up early and jog with ruhaizat dear.yeah man!!
see!!i jog today.:)but not going to cycle with friends.was piss off with mother since dont know when.

dont judge me anyhow can mother?i hate you when you do that.i really hate itand since im going to work there again.
dont make a very very big FUSS out of it.seriously.
FFFFF.

woohoo.today is my last exam!its over.no need to stuudy my ass of anymore.
now have to clean up my messy messy room.woohoo!after exam,i have lunch with my precious friends.
saerah,indra,ernie,indra,aishah and.plus today we get our class tee.niice.mine's red.
i can now sleep longs long hours exclude the part when i work.i dont look forward for that.dont look forward for work at all.
don't know why.even how much i need cash.to save up for things i crave.I'm PLAIN LAZY TO GO WORK.

since its holiday,i'm going to make full use of it.i'm going to jog.muahaha!do some SIT UP!!
haha,well,thats what i say now.don't know if i'm really going to do it or not.like i said.i'm plain lazy.

i'm going to read read read!i've been neglect my novels which i bought since i don't know when.
yeah.the last book of the TWILIGHT SAGA.i know.i dont say im a big fan of it.i find it interesting.can't wait isabelle to get married
and give birth to baby.btw I LIKE JACOB.don't ask why.but i think jacob feels pain in the book.most of the time.nevermind.

and ohh yahh!!damn it,CP GROUP!!willie and dear yingzhi is in other group.damn lahh se!!
now cannot have break with willie.now cannot disturb yingzhi!hailamak.
our INCHARGE IS clinical instructor in ward 53.indra said she's okay.just need to get all the facts right.AND IM SCARE.
WOOHOO!!scare.

tomorrow morning want to jog or not??with my new new sport shoe!!my old sport shoe is lost!
bloody fuckers dont know how to take care of my shoes.
tomorrow want to cycling or not??at pasir ris?with saerah,ernie.alia,revathy,amirah and indra.?
not sure lahh se!!

ohh shiit!!the class chalet they give the date kinda last minute forme.they just told me today.its on the 11&12 december.
and i work on both days.damnlahh se!!
HAILAMAK!!and i cant go.sorry you guys.happy bbq!!

behavioural sciences is over.glad,after this concentrate on my clinical nursing.
tmr is the examination.alrights,nowadays i've been losing my appetite.just great right?
last few weeks i've been eating like a pig.like there's no tmr.you guys can see right?my tummy?
BLOATED.i even go out with the bloated tummy.SEXY right?like real.
i'm not myself lately.i'm amaze that how can my bloody mouth SHUTUP for a very long time.i find everything around me verry verry extremely irritating.see how i emphasize on that.dont ask why.


i'm amaze.
I didnt know back then how to feel and describe that feeling.
until i met someone who came and exit. Ughh.
well,it's beautiful world after all.


i'm addicted to it.i'm addicted to it.
stop me will you?stop me before it's too late.



i love you baby.

been studying off.hope my effort pays off.haha,even if its not.
i'll try harder for my clinical posting.this few days been sitting at home.
i dont want work lahh.must guve schedule for next week.life at swensen will not be the same.
even if i dont jiwa at swensen but to know kak mariah is going to transfer to jp.
it'll be different.she is the one who recommended me to swensen.she is the one who always care.
i mean i know others will care.haha.what the crap.
kak mariah.good luck k when working over there.take good care.
okay ffff,i'm emotional nowadays.
damn lahh se.
weirdly enough im attracted to stuff i should not be attracted to.
forgive me.i'm cheating myself man.should stop this madness.
before it get too too too late.

i love you baby.