i've scratch my head til it bleeds. it's awesome. i try to think of a plan to kill. it's awesome.
it's good to be lost. it's awesome.

i keep on losing my temper. it's not awesome.

it's good to be alone. it's super awesome.

FUCK!

They avoid each other. They fight about money. They don't sleep with each other.
What fucking thing will happen next?

FUCK MY FUCKING WORLD!!

I think this post will just be full of crap.

I had enough of all the madness happen.
i wish i could just fade away just like that.

I know i have this issues. Anger issues. I know i know i know. People say relax and take a deep deep deep breath, i tried. I always try but what the heck. I really hate if people are just trying to be on my nerve by saying, you need to be more patient. FUCK THEM. I know their intention is true but i TRIED OKAY.

Fuck my mind for thinking too much of unnecesary stuff. It just clot my my mind up. Making it more confusing and all. Making me break down even more nowadays.

I'm on my verge to break.

what you want from me?

Just don't give up
I'm workin' it out
Please don't give in
I won't let you down
It messed me up, need a second to breathe
Just keep coming around
Hey, whataya want from me
Whataya want from me

SO UNCLEAR LOR!!

This is the second post for this year, I'm so super bored. I can just stare at nothing and do nothing and think nothing. Okay, crap.

I've been suffering for the past few days with awesomely back pain that radiate to the leg. Can't sleep. Oh god, You guys should know how much i love sleeping.

FUTURE IS UNCLEAR. All i can see is blurry vision. blurry indeed. I'mm like a lost sheep. I don't know what I'm going to do for my future. I can't plan because i'm confused. Really, i do.
I can't decide because I'm stuck. I don't know if i want to study or work. Maybe i should just rot at home. Yeahh, maybe i should.

I'm happy for no reasons sometimes. Maybe it's you who make my stomach screams.

happy new year dudes!

This is the first first post for 2010. So.... HAPPY NEW YEAR! What the heck, it's still feels the same for me. Nothing change. Everything come and go. Everything go up and down.

Everything is fast and slow. SO practically everything is everything. Same old same old.

Every time i press new post, NOTHING comes into mind. Suddenly the mind just shut down. SO this is a random post whereby the post can be stupid, the post can be dumb, the post can be angry, the post can be happy, the post can be all in the world of shit I'm in. Yeahs, all the shit I'm in. Same old same old.

Some said i lost weight. Some said I'm still the same. Some said i look like shit. Some said i gain weight, and i said WHAT THE HECK. I DON'T CARE. But but but some remarks pulls my esteem down SO i decided to shoot him/her down only in my mind where everything seems wonderful. Wonderful indeed.

As usual I'm still unclear about what will unfolds in near future. Oh shit, what will happen to me? What will i do? Yeahs, I'm still lost in this world. Lost indeed. So when you asked me what will i do, i just answer I DON'T KNOW.

2009.. What can i say about that year? Well, it contains a lot of shit and puke face people trying to shit and puke at me. I've lost almost everything in the world for just one fuck face. I care too much til it hurts. I give so much that i can call myself DUMB. I love a fuck face that i fail to notice the shit fuck face've done. You only stand up for just once. Once is never enough. I mask a happy face thought a fuck face is the only fucking one for me. I will never let you fuck my life anymore.

I look like I've move on but i don't. It's still hurt. I just want to give a final slap or anything that can inflict pain on you just to give me that satisfaction and pleasure. SHIIT YOU!!

I feel like throwing plates onto the floor. That satisfaction i need.

After giving so much but in the end it doesn't even matter because i still feel empty inside.

This is shiit feelings. I feel like shooting myself. I feel like escaping and run away so far where people can't find me. I need to find me. I can't rely on myself no more.

Want to run away so badly.

Stupid post.

I feel like giving up.

Mark my words.
I don't care if you don't care.
I feel there's no respect between me and you.
I feel that you don't value me at all.

"Flaws and all" -Beyonce

I'm a train wreck in the morning
I'm a bitch in the afternoon
Every now and then without warning
I can be really mean towards you
I'm a puzzle yes in deed
Ever complex in every way
And all the pieces aren't even in the box
And yet, you see the picture clear as day.

[Chorus]
I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
And that's why I love you [3x]

I neglect you when I'm working
When I need attention I tend to nag
I'm a host of imperfection
And you see past all that
I'm a peasant by some standards
But in your eyes I'm a queen
You see potential in all my flaws
and that's exactly what I mean.

[Chorus]
I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
and that's why I love you [3x]

[Repeat Chorus]

if there's a contest title sleeping queen.
i can be the queen.

i swear if i have the power to kill.
i will kill!! i will kill all of you!!
two faces bitch!!

Don't tell me you guys don't kiss.
I'm freaking bored and at the same time feeling relax.
I'm off now. Finding food.

How to kiss with passion.

I stayed home today.
I slept the whole day.
I like it.

LOVE OF MY LIFE.

First of all, SOUR SWEETS ROCKS!! YOU ROCK MY WORLD!!

It is my company when i'm sleepy. Even it doesn't make any different.

I know it make alot of effort in waking me up.

Secondly, COFFEE!!! YOU ARE MY LOVER. ALWAYS MINE.

Yeahh, this lover of mine always get a kiss from me for almost every morning.

I feel lost and empty when i don't have you in my starting day.

I keep on losing into my wonderland and i need a hard nudge from a friend to stay alive.

You make a different in my life.

Thirdly, MY SOFT SPONGECAKE BED. YOU ARE SIGNIFICANT IN MY LIFE.

Yes you darling have been there for me every single day. Yes you, i love you baby.

You have been there for me in sadness, madness, craziness, hotness, coldness and alot more i can do with you. I want to thank you for loving me and accepting me for the way i am.

I want to be with you every single day. Every morning, when i part from you, i feel lost.

I miss you till i sleep practically everywhere. Outside MLT, train, bus and while standing up.

I miss you that much. You are the love of my life.

If you don't care. i don't care too.

I Miss You.

To see you when I wake up
Is a gift I didn't think could be real.
To know that you feel the same as I do
Is a three-fold, Utopian dream.

You do something to me that I can't explain.
So would I be out of line if I said "I miss you"?

I see your picture.
I smell your skin on
The empty pillow next to mine.
You have only been gone ten days,
But already I'm wasting away.
I know I'll see you again
Whether far or soon.
But I need you to know that I care,
And I miss you.

I Miss You : Incubus.

I'm addicted to facebook. laugh out loud.
Who doesn't?

harmony? your bloody head!

I'm bored lazy. All that related to sloth.
I'm feeling that.

I just don't know how to react on certain things.
I just don't know what to say anymore.
I just don't know how to feel.

I'm cruel at times, evil too. Spare me, that's the way i am.

I think THIS is unfair.
Look around you, what you see the most?
Look around you, what you hear the most?
Look around you, how you feel about THIS?
People says life is unfair.
I know it's unfair.
THIS is too obvious.
It's just not fair anymore.

I'm furious but what can i do?

NOTHING.
Nothing can change THIS.