Love. Lost.

The love of my life.

Fly away.

With just one blow.

I lost the love.

Empty

When you know you are actually longing for someone to hold, there's no one there.

When you know you are actually missing someone, there's no one missing you back.

When you know you love that someone so much, that someone don't even love you back.

When you know your heart feels empty without that someone, you can't do anything about it.

Helpless as I can be.

Emotional as I tried not to.

Anger just buried inside.

I am breaking apart.

I can't rely on myself.

I'm trying to get back on my feet.

I'm trying to feel again.

I'm trying to love me again.

I love you but wait, what's good is love anyway.?

Loving you still.

I love you and you must know that. I miss you and you must know that. Only god knows how I feel. I told you before no words can describe the love I felt for you. I can't believe you left me cold like this. I'm still in denial. I can't accept this yet. I'm still in love with you.

Not okay.

If you know me too well. You shall know I'm not okay. So don't repeat question about me being okay because at the end of the fucking day I shall only reply I Will be okay.

I unable to find myself. I lost it. Seriously lost it. I drown myself in sorrow every single night. Just to think of you.

I just feel like cutting my heart out to show you how I feel for you but its fucking wrong to do it.

People said just let it go, you Will find someone. God have plans for us. However I can't let it go. Well, at the end of the day I must learn to let it go. Only left with a distant memories.

Personally, I think most guys are the same. Fucking Shit is contain in their head. Forgive me if you guys disagree but already stated MOST. I shall never look in relationship the same ever again. Sickening you can say.

I must be stupid to wait.

I have been thinking a lot nowadays. not myself. Mixture of feeling. Angry.. Sadness.. Mostly angry. Can't make myself detach of longing for someone. God help your poor soul. I can rely on myself.

Must

must be strong. Must detach myself from negativity. Must not stay stagnant like this forever. You can do this Faizah.

Don't

Don't make me fall in the endless pit of fucking Shit. I'm already at my downside. Today is one of those days.

Fucked up head man

I'm treated like Shit over and over again. I really wonder what did the Fuck I do til I have this mother fucking treatment.
I mean like, if there's a fucking mistakes I did better tell me right on my beautiful Damn face so that I Will learn and grow at the fucking same time.

Tell me you fucking bitch, I didn't take a fucking mc, you bitch about me. I took mc also you fucking bitch about me. What the Fuck you want from me you mother Fucker. Fuck your low life immature brains you fucking bitch.

I kept quiet all this while not for you to step on my fucking head you mother Fucker. Oh my. I thank god for letting me hold this anger of mine. I swear I can just blow up right on your mother fucking face. You Fucker dick head.

You both bitch deserve to die! I'm mother fucking Pissed.
How the Fuck am I suppose to grow if my Damn superiors are not showing a good fucking example and guide your people properly.

Arrgh! Fuck it man!

Back stabbing.

You can take that knife plunge into my back over and over again til it pierce through my chest, I'm used to it. Do it la.

Me.

I bought a make up thingy for myself. So not myself, I know. Haha. Bought liquid eye liner, mascara, brushes and eye shadows. Haha. Okay. I'm excited but at the same time I felt like Fucked up because I don't knkw how to use it. Time to learn. Hahaha.

Okay alright.. I know it has been a long time since I blog. Forgive me for my mistakes in my grammar. It sucks. Haha.

Love

Love me without fear. Trust me without wondering. Love me without restrictions. Want me without demand. Accept me for who I am.

Healing,

Healing the heart is a gradual process of unfoldment, one layer at a time. Each time we think we are through our healing, we really just healed one layer.

Change.

Don't change because they ask you to. They should accept the you are. They should adapt the way you are.

your heart

It is impossible for your heart to open fully to another when it is completely closed to someone in your past.

Fucking Shit

Even our 24th together you can't spend time with me.

Hmmm.

Aku akui aku merinduimu.

Teramat sekali.

"Love You Like A Love Song"

[Verse 1]
It's been said and done
Every beautiful thought's been already sung
And I guess right now here's another one
So your melody will play on and on, with the best of them
You are beautiful, like a dream come alive, incredible
A centerfold miracle, lyrical
You've saved my life again
And I want you to know baby

[Chorus]
I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby

And I keep hittin re-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat

I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby

And I keep hittin re-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat

[Verse 2]
Constantly, boy you played through my mind like a symphony
There's no way to describe what you do to me
You just do to me, what you do
And it feels like I've been rescued
I've been set free
I am hypnotized by your destiny
You are magical, lyrical, beautiful
You are... And I want you to know baby

[Chorus]
I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby

And I keep hittin re-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat

I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby

And I keep hittin re-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat

[Bridge]
No one compares
You stand alone, to every record I own
Music to my heart that's what you are
A song that goes on and on

[Chorus]
I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby

And I keep hittin re-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat-peat

I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby
I, I love you like a love song, baby

I love you...like a love song...

"Rain On Me"

It's a sunny day
So I got nowhere to hide
Not a cloud in the sky
So I'm pretending I've got something in my eyes
Just so you won't see me cry

So I wait for the storm, (oooh)
To hide all my tears
But it's taking too long
But I won't run for the door, (oooh)
'Coz if you think I'm weak then that makes you strong

So rain on me,
What's the price of thunder?
Rain on me
It's like I'm waiting in a hundred degrees
So rain on me
I'll be standing under
So rain on me
Disguise my tears so that you'll never see
Let it rain (let it rain, let it rain on me, let it rain, let it rain on me)
Let it rain (my tears are the rainfall and flow right to the sea)
Let it rain (let it rain, let it rain on me, let it rain, let it rain on me)
Let it rain (my tears are the rainfall and flow right to the sea)

I won't give you the pleasure
To see me breaking
And that's how you'll remember me
You're not worth it
I'll get better, only down for a second
I won't give you the victory

So I wait for the storm, (oooh)
To hide all my tears
But it's taking too long
But I won't run for the door, (oooh)
'Coz if you think I'm weak then that makes you strong

So rain on me,
What's the price of thunder?
Rain on me
It's like I'm waiting in a hundred degrees
So rain on me
I'll be standing under
So rain on me
Disguise my tears so that you'll never see
Let it rain (let it rain, let it rain on me, let it rain, let it rain on me)
Let it rain (my tears are the rainfall and flow right to the sea)
Let it rain (let it rain, let it rain on me, let it rain, let it rain on me)
Let it rain (my tears are the rainfall and flow right to the sea)

It's a sunny day,
So I got nowhere to hide
Not a cloud in the sky
So I'm pretending I've got something in my eyes
Just so you won't see me cry

So rain on me,
What's the price of thunder?
Rain on me
It's like I'm waiting in a hundred degrees
So rain on me
I'll be standing under
So rain on me
Disguise my tears so that you'll never see
Let it rain (let it rain, let it rain on me, let it rain, let it rain on me)
Let it rain (my tears are the rainfall and flow right to the sea)
Let it rain (let it rain, let it rain on me, let it rain, let it rain on me)
Let it rain (my tears are the rainfall and flow right to the sea)

Let it rain, let it rain, let it rain, let it rain, oh
Let it rain, let it rain, let it rain, let it rain
Let it rain, let it rain, let it rain, let it rain

You

Have my heart.

What the hell

I don't know what goes through my mind.

I'm so confused.

Wire mix and tangle. Ugh just what i need.